The James Song
by RiddikulusWaterbender
Summary: Lily asks if James was ever annoying to Remus. Sirius answers her... IN SONG!


**So I recently found out about this song and I liked it so much that I wanted to Marauder-ify it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own "The Duck Song" and Harry Potter.**

**:**

"Sirius, has James ever annoyed Remus?" Seventh year Lily asked Sirius one night in the Gryffindor common room. She was looking at James and Remus, who were pleasantly chatting with each other, with her quill in her hand. Sirius, who was sitting in another chair, turned his head to look at her.

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, usually _you're_ the one bothering him all the time," she said twirling her quill. "So I wanted to know if James was the same."

"Of _course_ he annoys Remus! He does it all the time! You're just not around to see it."

Sirius suddenly pulled the house's guitar playing musician over. Lily put down her quill and rolled her eyes. "What now?"

"I'm going to tell you a little story... IN SONG!" Lily raised her eyebrows.

The kid strummed several chord. "This story took place in the summer break last year." Sirius tapped his knee and began to sing.

:

_Bum bum bum, badabadum,_

_James walked up to the chocolate bar stand_

_And he said to Remus, running the stand,_

"_Oi!" Bum bum bum. "Got any beans?"_

_Remus said "No we just sell chocolate bars_

_But it's warm and it's good and it's all from afar-s,_

_Can I get you a bit?"_

_James said, "Don't want it."_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Till the very next day_

_Bum bum bum bum bumbadum_

_When James walked up to the chocolate bar stand_

_And he said to Remus running the stand,_

"_Oi!" Bum bum bum. "Got any beans?"_

_Remus said "No, like I said yesterday,_

_I just sell chocolate bars, okay?_

_Why not give them a try?"_

_James said "Goodbye!"_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Till the very next day_

_Bum bum bum bum bumbadum_

_When James walked up to the chocolate bar stand_

_And he said to Remus running the stand,_

"_Oi!" Bum bum bum. "Got any beans?"_

_Remus said "Really, this is getting quite old,_

_Chocolate is all I've ever eaten and sold._

_Wanna give it a go?"_

_James said "How 'bout, no."_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Till the very next day_

_Bum bum bum bum bumbadum_

_:_

Sirius paused for a few seconds while Lily shook her head.

:

_When James walked up to the chocolate bar stand_

_And he said to Remus running the stand,_

"_Oi!" Bum bum bum. "Got any beans?"_

_Remus said "THAT'S IT! If you don't stay away, James,_

_I'll hex you to a tree, I'm not playing games!_

_I know Kung-fu!"_

_James said "Adieu!"_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Till the very next day_

_Bum bum bum bum bumbadum_

_When James walked up to the chocolate bar stand_

_And he said to Remus running the stand,_

"_Oi!" Bum bum bum. "Got any wands?"_

"_What?"_

"_Got any wands?"_

"_No, why would I- oh."_

"_Then one more question for you:"_

:

Another short pause.

:

"_Got any beans?"_

_Bum bum bum, bum bum bum._

_And Remus just stopped._

_Then he started to smile._

_He started to laugh._

_He laughed for a while._

_He said "Come on James, let's walk to the sweets store,_

_I'll buy you Bertie Botts Beans, so you won't have to ask anymore._

_The boys walked to the store and Remus bought some beans._

_He gave one to James and James said "Well, no thanks!_

_But do you know what sounds good?_

_It would make my day._

_Do you think this store..._

_Do you think this store..._

_Do you think this store..._

_Has any _chocolate bars_?"_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger swagger_

_Then he swaggered away_

_Swagger swagger..._

:

Sirius stopped and took a bow with the guitar dude.

"So yeah, he annoyed him. The end."

Lily was silent for a few seconds.

"Okay then," she said. "I'm off to bed." She walked up the stairs and into her dormitory, all the while thinking that that was the most annoying song she ever heard.

**:**

**This was fun! I might be doing more of these.**


End file.
